By Shazia Majale,
NAIROBI, Kenya- Are you quite well? How are you feeling today?
That’s what my Bible App asks every time I open it and most of the time I skip that question. In these past two weeks however I’ve answered the question.
It’s probably the most genuine thing I’ve wanted to talk about.
Dancing between happiness, excitement, hope, despair, sadness and calm is no mean feat. In a day, an hour maybe, all these emotions get invoked.
Living at a time like this (of unrest and activism) presents unprecedented anxiety.
Between being involved and up to date, performing one’s everyday duties or even being involved really in anything productive becomes a struggle.
While the mental health ambassadors say they decompress and disengage, how on earth does one do that with social media and the internet.
The Fear of Missing Out is real, people! In 5 minutes a whole event has happened and it’s developing into something totally different. The anxiety that a revolution comes with is totally pulsating if not life threatening.
In the midst of the advocacy, civic education, history lessons, truths, lies and half-lies, evidence, threats , assurances and abductions one wonders how best to represent themselves in the chaos.
In households with underage children one scratches their head on how well to navigate such conversations when the kids are privy to news and hearsay from all over.
Talking in hushed tones about controversial happenings gets them more curious and good Lord these little people can ask questions!
When one ponders at the happenings and the uncertainty of the future, there’s a lot of room to go to unscaled heights. Going back and forth between the past, the present and the future; no definitive conclusions on the horizon.
Fears from the past,unsaid emotions never said to anyone, nightmares from things that scare one in the daylight.
Scared from what maybe.Our emotions get all tangled up and after a week like this when someone asks how are you feeling?
I think I should be allowed to say: I feel dejected from the lives ended so young and abrupt, from feeling scared at what going into town might get me into, from the anxiety that stepping out of the house means for millions of people, insomniac from replaying the weeks event, pissed at the less than average legislators, oppressed by a system meant to protect its people and mostly unsure about what tomorrow may bring.
And a lot more.
